Paint’s Blog

>
> About two years ago my wife and I were on a cruise through the western
> Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner.
>
> At dinner we noticed an elderly lady sitting alone along the rail of
the
>
> grand stairway in the main dining room. I noticed that all the staff,
> ship officers, waiters, busboys, etc. all seemed very familiar with
> this lady. I asked our waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told
> she owned the line, but he said he only knew that she had been on
> board for the last four cruises, back to back.
>
> As we left the dining room one evening, I caught her eye and stopped
> to say hello. We chatted and I said, “I understand you’ve been on this
> ship
for
> the
> last four cruises.” She replied, “Yes, that’s true.” I stated, “I
> don’t understand” and she replied without a pause, “It’s cheaper than
> a nursing home.”
>
> So, there will be no nursing home in my future. When I get old and
> feeble, I am going to get on a Princess cruise ship. The average cost
> for a nursing home is $200 a day. I have checked on reservations at
> Princess and I
can
> get
> a long term discount and senior discount price of $135 per day.
>
> That leaves $65 a day for:
> 1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
> 2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the
> restaurant or I can have room service (which means I can have
> breakfast in bed every day of the week.) 3. Princess has as many as
> three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers and
> shows every night.
> 4. They have free toothpaste, razors, soap and shampoo.
> 5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra
> $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
> 6. I will get to meet new people every 7 to 14 days.
> 7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing?
> Need to have the mattress replaced? No problem! They will fix
> everything and apologize for your inconvenience.
> 8. Clean sheets and towels every day and you don’t even have to ask
> for them.
> 9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip, you are on
> Medicare. If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship, they will
> upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.
>
> Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the Panama
> Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia or name where you want to
> go?
>
> Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don’t look for me in a
nursing
>
> home, just call shore to ship.
>
> P. S. And don’t forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side
> at no extra charge!