Paint’s Blog

iKarith Wrote:
Solution: Vote. In primaries. For people who will not compromise us closer to destruction. Vote for well-spoken men and women of character who understand the risks we face if we get it wrong at this late hour. Vote for people whose compassion is genuine, but whose resolve is unshakable. Vote for people who understand that we can’t fix it in a day, but that it must be fixed and that the process needs to begin a decade ago. Vote for candidates who know how close we are to losing the light of liberty in our lifetimes and will work hard to restore it, one liberty at a time if necessary, until We The People are once again sovereign.

Do not vote for the gladhander who will say what you want to hear until he has your vote. Do not vote for the loudmouth who does more to incite a crowd than to lead them. Do not vote for the dispassionate idealist because he cannot cope with reality. Do not vote for the fanatic for whom no barrier would be an impediment because We The People are supposed to be such a barrier.

And most importantly, do not vote for the incumbent just because you don’t think he’s done anything wrong. Now is the time to demand of our government that they prove they have earned the office we have given them. If they haven’t been doing our work, they need to get out. And there should be no sacred cows—even Ron Paul (a dispassionate idealist if ever there was one, Obama’s polar opposite) needs to fear that if he can’t pull his head out of his ass and take action to stop the destruction of our country, then he should be replaced by someone who will.

just way too much on my mind.. i would think with being emplyed again some of this would stop..

but as i lay in bed all kinds of stuff from the past few years just decided to flood back in my head.. maybe it’s being off a roadand hearing the cars or the  shot guns going off in the distace.. , maybe it’s the rain…. i’m not sure but something triggered this weird rsinking feeling.

i know i’m stressed for my country and i dought this health care debacle is helping…

but the stuff that was flooding back was my jack ass landlord  from, korea town in LA ,

and that  scum bag ,  david scanlan from  studio city.

the none who nearly raped me and worked by 40+ hours a weeks at slave wages ..

the  people who tried to rob me in LA,

getting assaulted .. by “clients who tried to steal a laptop…   you can see in a nut shell why i don’t miss Los Angeles on so many levels…

sure there are things i miss, i miss almost all my co-workers from digital domain… i miss some of the shops and eateries that are only on the west coast. but most of my real friends i can contact on face book.. i do miss the  good paying job…… if the good paying job wasn’t in a city that decided to tax us into and unlivable bracket….

it is hard laying here and weighing the pro’s and cons of the move sometimes i wonder if it wouldn’t of been a better idea to of just stuck it out..  maybe we could of stayed in that studio a few months longer and i could of affored to pay our rent .. maybe matt would of gotten a new job…. and we would of been ok….

then i watch teh news and see how badly CA is run into the dirt and  decide it’s probly better this way ..and i remember the aforementioned  “issues” that still haunt me  when i close my eyes and i’m alone.. Matt often wonders why i don’t like sleeping without him.. why i need to hold him at night.. one of those reasons is he protects me from those images .. from Dave, from that clockwork records guy who i don’t think  ever gave  us his real name..  ….  these things still are wounds that cut deep.

things i wonder if maybe i shouldn’t of tried to geta hold of my current partners  sooner and moved back east .. maybe i would of had a better portfolio…. but  what it all comes down too. is no matter what was or could have been i have to push forward ..  i do have a few news things from moving east .. sadly Savannah has not turned out to be the berst place for work in my feild but i knew that… i would rather be in Atlanta.. but maybe things are lining up for a change of pace..

lately i feel i should go a head and use some of my other talents . maybe see if i can get a job at animal control.. continue doing sales on the weekend for a large corp… and  web-admin in my sparetime build websites and make bumper  stickers for the tea-parties .

at this point i feel so torn.. i want to have my career but i want a family too.

i want to get out of debt. sometimes it feels like the closer i get the further i am ..

i’m just going to try to keep my head up. but. i feel like i’m just treading water torn between so many directions.. i almost just hope Matt gets a job at this point. in many ways he is the more talented of our duo..and i think it might be time to follow him. he moved to LA for me .. …..

i have a lot to meditate on….

although i miss working close to my feild .

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